A Momentary Lapse of Confidence

May 23, 2013


There’s something I still haven’t learned, even though I know it for sure. That is: I can make cocktails. I do them on the spot, all the time. I’ve written entire menus and hundreds of cocktails for all kinds of different bars and restaurants and parties and weddings and bachelor parties and groups of people who are celebrating or grieving or bored or lonely.

But every time I work on my own cocktail menu, I seethe with doubt and self recrimination for about a month before launch. The lesson is that I should just put the friggin’ list together from what I do casually instead of sweating it out and screwing myself out of countless hours of what should be quality time not thinking about booze.

Bobby Bare Jr. helped me figure it out.

Bobby Bare Jr. wrote a song called “Dig Down,” where he bitches about Pete Townsend and The Beatles and Frank Black having already written all the good songs, so what the Christ is he supposed to do? The cool thing is that it’s a great song. See the irony there? ‘Course you do, you’re smart and nice and pretty.

Don’t get all weird on me. I’m not saying it takes the same talent to write “Baba O’ Riley” as it does to come up with a cocktail, but try to be truly original with something. Or even name something that’s truly original. I’ll wait here while you think about it. Good luck to you.

Inspiration comes from somewhere, and I’ll hang my hat on that. Like everyone else who does a job like mine who probably just accepts it and gets on with it.

Alright, no more point-making. The new cocktail menu is done, and it’s delicious and adventurous and classic-ish and crowd pleasing according to my conscious mind. My unconscious mind is still telling me I’m a hack and could stand to lose a few pounds and need a new haircut, but I’ll drink it into quietness and just let you handsome sumbitches tell me the truth.

Matt Johnson
co-proprieter / maker of cocktails
Feedback Lounge


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